And This Christmas....

I have tried my best not to get into the Christmas spirit this year. There have been so many things that have happened to me and my family that the only thing I really was looking forward to was Shaq against Kobe on TV that day. If my attitude would have been like this 3 years ago I would have been fine. There is one little problem now. I have a baby to buy presents for. That pretty much takes away the ability to ignore the holiday. I figure if I had good Christmas memories then she deserves it too. Today I am reflecting on my childhood Christmas mornings. My mama would let us get up at midnight to open our gifts but she had this thing where we had to go to sleep first before she would let us open them. It could be 11:59 and you had to go to sleep. Sometimes her and my dad would get drunk and sleep until 3 or 4 and we would wait until sunlight. I can still remember going to sleep and waking back up to realize that Big Cliff had been up all night trying to put all those complicated ass toys together. I won't even mention the year everybody got their first Atari 2600 game console. It was Christmas night before we got Pac Man to show on that old black and white TV. When I was a kid, our tree was never color coordinated. We put anything and any color on there. We even had beer cans as Christmas ornaments. I can't stand when people have those boring one or two color trees with no personality like the kind they have in the bank lobby. In my late teens and early 20's, Christmas was the time when I had to buy 5 or 6 of the same lotion from Victoria Secrets as gifts so I wouldn't get confused about what girl got what flavor. It's hard to find a jewelry store that has the same four pair of earrings in stock. That was also a time when you could talk ladies into breaking you off as a gift! That was a cool time but I digress. Since my parents are in Memphis and I don't have a need to go to Victoria Secrets or Zales anymore, I will spend this Christmas with my tool set ( to put together a Dora Table), my James Brown Christmas album, and my friend Jack Daniel with his cousin Coke. I'll miss sitting in the kitchen eating gumbo with the family and there is nothing more heart warming than watching little kids in New Orleans riding their bikes on Christmas before somebody steals them a few weeks later. I'll get over all of that when I am outside in Mississippi trying to teach a two year old to sit and pedal a Barbie baby tricycle. I think I better not hang out with my boy Jack until I put the wheels on. Merry Christmas and Happy Kwaanza.

Cliff's Christmas Memory List
Best Toy - Cowboy and Indian Train Set
Worst Toy - The cap gun I shot the neighbor in the eye with
Best Gift - Vina bought me my first Gangsta Hat when I was 21
Worst Gift - A watch with the velcro band (the giver will not be named so I don't get in trouble)
Favorite Song - Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto, James Brown
Worst One - Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt
Favorite Childhood Memory - Playing basketball with my daddy when I was 5 after he put up my first goal.
Favorite Adult Memory - This answer is censored.