Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Get ya Happy On

This blog entry was highly influenced by the 50 times straight that I have listened to Get ya Hustle On by Juvenile. He is definitely the best MC to ever come out of New Orleans...

I am still in my groove. I had some tequila last night. I am slightly dazed this morning. It's time to take tequila off of the drink list. Other than that I feel like a million bucks. Of course, I only have about five bucks in my pocket but that's cool too. Being happy in New Orleans after Katrina takes some sacrifice and hard choices. It comes down to five key elements.
1. Do not take any trips to the Lower Ninth Ward
2. Eat grits every morning for breakfast
3. Do not watch any local newscast
4. Do not read any local newspapers
5. One large house special every evening.

If I follow these rules, I should make it to Jackson this weekend in good spirits.

Now, on to other things...

Why in the world are we turning over security of the ports to a company owned by the United Arab Emarites. This is the part of the world where Al Queda members plot, plan and launder their money. Two of the 9/11 hijackers were from there. Now, we are going to let their state run company control six major ports in America including the one where I live? You know it makes me "happy" when this administration does something to prove that all of this fighting has more to do with money than national security. I find it strange that an American citizen can get out of jail for a felony and never get a job or vote again, yet a country that has supported terrorists gets control of the ports. That is totally mind boggling to me. Who is going to screen their employees? I have a cousin that can't get a good job because her mom put the water bill in her name when she was 10. Surely, a man with a Bin Laden poster on his wall is not going to get a chance to work at the port of New York. I guess next week, Michael Brown from FEMA is going to announce his candidacy for mayor of New Orleans. I better stop now before Dick Cheney reads this and shoots me "accidentially".

It would make me real "happy" if Shani Davis could win this next race coming up and quiet all the media that is trying to make him seem unpatriotic by not skating in the team events. I saw him and his mama last night on ESPN and this has now turned into one of those hood vs. mainstream events that come up from time to time in society. The only problem is that blacks don't really follow the Winter Olympics so no one knows he needs our support.

It would make me "extremely ecstatic" if someone like the Wu Tang Clan or KRS One would bum rush the stage and beat the snot out of Britney Spears husband before he can get out one lyric of that garbage he calls hip hop.

I would be happy if someone can tell me how to get that damn "Lean with it Rock with it" song by the Franchize Boys out of my head. Once I seen the video I was hooked.

It would make me "overly joyous" if all the rich Nigerians with secret diamond mines and hidden bank accounts would stop asking me to help them and their families come to America. Look my motherland brothers, my bank knows I am broke. They know my balance is only high around income tax time. If I put that six million you keep emailing me about in there it would send the FEDS straight to me. Now if it is a scam you are just wasting your time with me. Taking my identity will only get you a few phone calls from Discover Card.

Finally.........(Switching over to New Orleans slang language)............

To the dude who gave me his middle finger this morning for making my turn after the light turned green...BITCH GETCHA MIND RIGHT! Before Katrina your punk ass would have been extra courteous thinking you would get the beatdown for running that light in that neighborhood. Now, you want to drive like a jackass. Just because our hood was destroyed doesn't mean we don't rep it whenever possible. Ask the city of Houston. If I see you again tomorrow morning and you run that light, I am going to whip your ass like you are in the Corps of Engineers in charge of levee designs....Ya heard me!

Now back to Juvie...

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