Friday, June 19, 2009

My Spotlight On Black Fathers

Father’s Day is Sunday and I want to wish all the fathers a peaceful and fun time. I will be heading to Memphis to kick it with Big Cliff in a few hours so this is my last words before the holiday gets here. I wanted to get something off of my chest before I go.

Last month I drove home the Friday before Mother’s Day and there were tables and stands all over the street with baskets and gifts to celebrate mama. I didn’t see one table in anticipation of Father’s Day. Mama definitely deserves her admiration but maybe since everyone agrees we have this problem with responsible fathers we should try giving more recognition and admiration to the ones who are trying to do the right thing.

We have been through all the chastising, the ridicule, the guilt by association, and the constant reminders of what black fathers don’t do. All of those things are real and I see the effects of it everyday but Sunday isn’t about them. Sunday is Father’s Day and that means we should be celebrating real daddies who get out there and grind for their kids. I just want everyone to know that if you have a man around you that is doing the right thing it is ok to put him on a pedestal for a few days. I am sure he would appreciate it. If we don’t start showing more admiration to the men who are trying than we do to the ones that are not, then what reason do those guys have to want to be like us when he is having more fun being selfish anyway? We say we want the brothers to stand up then we treat everything they do like it’s no big deal. At the same time that brother has to hear one of his friends that are supposed to be such a deadbeat brag about all the women he has and how much fun he’s having while not doing anything for anybody. I figure if a guy can ignore all of that temptation and stay focused the least we can do is let him have the big piece of chicken. How are we supposed to change a culture that has a major focus on self glorification when we don’t glorify the alternative at all? Yes, I know we are supposed to do these things anyway even if no one ever gives us recognition. We do this all the time but we are in crisis mode right now and the old approach hasn’t been working.

I’m giving the brothers love this weekend. We are going to make it better.


mominem said...

Happy Father's Day Cliff, I know you're one of the fathers making a difference.

On mothers day we take mom out to a restaurant. On Fathers day we send dad out in the back yard to cook for us.

cherie said...

Another great post, saying it like it is. You are so right the men doing the right thing deserve our recognition & gratitude. Happy Father's Day to you!