Monday, December 31, 2012

2013: Moving Forward and Looking Back To A Lazy 2012

2012 is coming to a close. The best thing about this year is that for the first year in a long time I didn’t have to be anyone’s pall bearer. Despite the ups and downs this makes the year a good one overall for me.

In 2013 my daughter will be taking the Leap test to move to the 5th grade. I’m not nervous about it. That test is still stupid. I can remember writing about my frustration getting her registered for kindergarten almost five years ago. She’s growing up while I and this blog are getting old.

In 2013 I will celebrate my 39th birthday which means I have one more year left before my 40’s start.  Since the life expectancy for black men is 70 years old, I think 39 is a good year for a cool mid life crisis. I think I’m going to let my hair grow and get a mohawk. I hope it stays in style long enough for me to get it without looking out of touch like I really am.

In 2013 I will still be getting my middle class tax break from the president which will almost be enough to offset the increases in our agency’s insurance plan.

In 2013 something will happen in the country that challenges one group’s beliefs. Since we are no longer allowed to think beyond ideology anymore, that group will come up with a way to make an obvious problem unclear so we won’t develop any real solutions.

In 2013 New Orleans will host the Superbowl. Because we have no choice our leaders will have to embrace the NFL commissioner. He’ll probably get greeted at the airport by a second line and Mardi Gras Indians. At that point an entire fan base will all throw up simultaneously setting a world record and creating a financial boon for carpet cleaning services in the area.

Other than these things the only thing I am certain of is that 2013 will look a lot like 2012, 2011, 2010, etc…..

When the calendar changes to a new year it gives you a feeling of starting fresh. There are two times a year where people talk themselves into thinking they can reset their lives. One of those times is your birthday and the other one is New Years. Those two annual days are used by humans to put off things they have wanted to work on but didn’t want to actually start working on. There are people who have been waiting since August to lose fifty pounds but they put it off and it becomes their New Year’s resolution. I’m starting to come to the realization that it doesn’t matter what I decide to because I’m probably not going to change much anyway.  I’m not saying that to be negative. I’m just being realistic. Nevertheless, it’s still good to look back at the year and see what went right and what went wrong. If I had to put a theme to 2012 it would be the year that I became lazy and partially tuned out on the world around me. This year was the year where I stopped paying attention like I used to.

I have always had a bit of a lazy streak in me. It goes hand in hand with my difficulty focusing on something for a long time. Most days my preference would be to do absolutely nothing. Somehow as an adult I have managed to push through it and develop a strong work ethic. It's the reason I have received perfect attendance records from employers and have so much vacation hours saved that I can take off weeks at a time. Being lazy as I am now hasn't stopped me from doing all the things I have to do throughout the week. Where my laziness kicks in is when it comes to things that I want to do or could be doing but have the option not to. My laziness shows up in the meetings and events I was invited to but didn’t attend. It’s in the rides to Memphis I didn’t take to see my parents. It’s in the voicemails I didn’t return, the family and friends I didn’t visit and all the weekends I stayed home and watched too much television. My laziness can be found in all of the things I didn’t read and things I didn’t write.

I bought a basketball a while ago because I love playing it. It was one thing I did as a kid that I missed and felt I could still do again even if I went out there in the morning and just shot free throws until I got into enough shape to play a game with the other guys. I’ve only used that ball once for about fifteen minutes.

Usually during the last week of the year I get in a deep state of reflection trying to get myself prepared for the upcoming year. This year it feels like I have been in that mode since late November trying to get my energy right. I’m working on that for the New Year.  That’s about all I can do to keep myself going. We have no idea what’s going to really happen next year. All you can do is make sure you are prepared and your own agenda is intact.

I’m ready for 2013. I hope everyone has a good one.

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